ich rutsch tiefer in dem Sessel und fühl mich benommen

hayyyy, i was like that the whole day. felt like a falling star without anywhere to crash into. :( my mood swings worsens each day. haven't been doing the transcendental meditation and the yoga that i desperately need. and ugh, i don't need inspiration, i need motivation from within. i'm now at my lowest point again. probably because i'm tired, hungry, and sad? naah, i boot the pc at midnight, checked on mails, found another letter from sedona.com with this header : “Positive Thinking” Actually Fails. guess what? i've been struggling to be more optimistic and forget about pessimism since i've seen that secret stuff (wanna see it again though) and now what? (if you wanna see the article, here is the link : http://www.sedona.com/lp-day52_fs.aspx) okay, somehow it had pacified me. here are the words of Hale Dwoskin:

When I was in my early 20s, I was extremely shy. I couldn’t approach women, I had no idea how to properly introduce myself to strangers, let alone make small talk. I’d heard that positive affirmations and “happy thoughts” could bury my fears and help me build the confidence I needed. I was certain that if I told myself I was great in a crowd, I would be great in a crowd. So, for months on end, I walked around all day long repeating over and over in my head, “I am highly pleasing to myself in the presence of other people.” In the meantime, I forgot to stop repeating and start living.

Instead of propelling my social life into the next dimension, my record-player thoughts played again and again in my head and I felt completely ridiculous! My quiet self-talk actually reminded me that I was SHY instead of helping me to overcome it. I didn’t need a positive self-talk mantra to overcome shyness. I didn’t need to pile more thoughts on top of the limiting thoughts I already had. I needed to LET GO of my shy thoughts. It was then that I learned The Sedona Method.

I learned The Sedona Method quickly and easily and finally learned how to release the limiting thoughts and emotions that actually made me shy. I learned to LET GO of my shyness, permanently, and now I speak before large groups as part of my job!

Positive thinking takes an immense amount of effort and, for most people, it doesn’t even work! It only covers the negative thoughts with positive ones and can still leave you crying on the inside. You’ve probably been around someone who smiles on the outside while screaming on the inside. It’s hard to be around those people; they send a real mixed message to others.

Imagine that your subconscious mind is a barrel. This barrel has a golden lining representing our unlimited potential. This golden lining is covered by a bunch of rotten apples that represent our limiting emotions: apathy, grief, fear, lust, anger, and pride. Even if you covered the golden lining over with good apples (happy thoughts and happy feelings), what would eventually happen to the apples? They would ROT.

I recommend emptying the barrel so you can discover the golden lining that is already present and available in your life at this very moment. You can’t see it because your apples, bad and good, have buried you under. Remove them by letting go of your limiting thoughts, feelings and beliefs and your thinking, feeling and life experience will be a thousand times more positive, with not a rotten apple in sight.

As you work with this simple process in your life, you will find that with less effort you will have a more positive mental attitude and your life will reflect this. You will finally start to have, be or do what you have always desired.

haay, somehow it relieved me. life is what we make it. i've covered myself with lotsa rotten apples, now i smell like rotten apples. i wonder what to do with these rotten apples. any suggestion?